FACTS

​Finally there it was, the thing he needed to face,

The fact that she used him after he had extended her grace,

A fact he never would have nor ever wanted to confess,

But every few months he throws up the thoughts he’s been trying to supress,

Gullible he was when he decided to trust her,

Now he can never forget, and things won’t ever be as they were,

Now a broken man trying to find the scattered pieces of life,

Trying to find the pieces to convince him that life is worth the fight.

2017
 

“Don’t Want To Cry No More”

I have cried and I have cried,
I have cried to the point of feeling tired,
I cannot stop the tears from pouring from my eyes,
And I cannot quiet the pain that’s screaming inside,
But I can suppress the thoughts from entering into my mind,
Yet I cannot convince the heart to look past to decline,
The grief that comes about every year around this time,
Oh why can’t the heart match the mind and be blind,
Blind to the fact that in 4 years you are still gone,
I just don’t want to hurt no more, I mean is that wrong?

2016

“Sleeping With The Enemy”

She felt it was wrong the moment he docked her door,
For the man standing there was certainly not sent from the Lord,
Yet she let him into her home and in her personal space,
Obviously he had an agenda as he moved at an accelerated pace,
She desperately wanted to say no but realized “no” was no longer an option,
And the aftermath of the night left her in need of a doctor,
She slept with the devil who tried viciously to tear her apart,
And every moment she laid with the enemy she wished for it to stop,
As her flesh sharply ripped she wrestled to push him away,
But he snatched her by the hair brutally having his way,
And she laid there dying on the inside trying hard not to cry,
It took forever as she thought within, “Why won’t this time pass by?”
Then the moment came and Satan reached his climax,
And she thought he’d leave, get out and away to relax,
But it didn’t end there for her, no he had an agenda to fulfill,
He came there to destroy her, yes his purpose was to kill,
So he threw her around again pounding blows to her opened wounds,
And with her arms bound she had no idea if she’d die or just bruised,
Regretting the choice she made to let that demon inside,
She wept whispering the name of Jesus time after time,
Thank God she made it through and out of it alive,
Although the situation makes her feel so very dead inside!
The pain in her body was so hard to bear,
So hard, extremely painful and yet another big scare,
But she is alive with the ability to face day after day,
As she tries to bathe rigorously the very touch of him away,
She slept with the enemy who ejaculated venom into her being,
So much so that only God can put an end to her grieving,
But will she turn back, will she fall down at her Father’s feet?
Or will she allow this ordeal to leave her feeling broken and incomplete?
What occured that night,  no given day since have changed,
She was battered by a demon who was viciously deranged!

Thinking Thoughts

Emotions flowing profusely,
Pouring out and flooding my brain,
Tears dropping plankity plank,
Down my face like the splattering rain,
Thoughts are trying to be thought,
While questions needing answers are sought,
In my moment of deep agonizing despair,
Into the far distance I gaze out and stare,
Thinking thoughts that are merely blank,
Painting pictures with no need of paint,
Spaced out and far gone into the depth of somewhere,
Moving here and about but not even going anywhere,
Thoughts rushing to form words a mile a minute,
Running its designated course trying to reach an ultimate finish.

(C) 2016

“Not Tonight”

Everyday she was awakened to the smell of breakfast cooking,
And greeted with a smile and the words “Good Morning good looking!”
What a way to wake up feeling on top of the world,
Just to lose it all within seconds as life spins and twirls,
For tomorrow is not promised so it’s best to live today,
And make peace with others, do good and pray,
Tell the ones you care about just how much you love them,
So that if tomorrow doesn’t come there won’t be no guilt,
For she longs for the scent of him  she can no longer smell,
Yes, she longs to hear the words he would always yell,
From the front of the house as he heard her footsteps,
Walking to meet him as he awaited at the doorstep,
Yet the sound is faint, it can no longer be heard,
For that voice is no more and the body is buried,
And she cries herself to sleep each and every night,
Knowing he won’t be able to join her once again tonight.
ⓒ 2015

“Don’t Want To Let Go”

She knows in her heart it’s time to let go,
Yet when she steps to the edge she won’t break ahold,
Just like a baby bird she’s afraid to leave the nest,
Afraid of what’s above and beyond the comfort of that nest,
Afraid to say goodbye because goodbye sounds like forever,
Afraid to break the unity they have built so strongly together,
Through obstacles, uphill battles and pain, they’ve conquered much,
In times of despair and weariness, it was your hand in which she clutched,
So how does she let go in order to face the path ahead?
How does she enter into the territory in which she dared not tread?
Yet she knows down in the depth of her being, she has to let go,
Because time won’t allot her to stay at the edge of the nest anymore!

“Thief In The Night”

Lately, anxiety has crept in again and again to torment me,
Without warrant or warning it’s flare presses hard against me,
A big ole bully you are to beat on me unexpectedly,
In fact a mere coward to sneak in and disrupt my inner faculties,
Just like a thief in the night you enter in to spoil my goods,
Then my heart beats rapid as if I were running all night in the woods,
Then comes dizziness, confusion, and shortness of breath,
Followed by sweat, patches of darkness and thoughts of death,
Oh how cruel you are to come in as you do,
And why you’ve entered my doors I haven’t the faintest clue,
But you’re not welcome here anymore, I’m putting you on notice,
I’ve posted the sign which says, “Anxiety is Out of Service!”
Go away, be gone, you’re never ever wanted here,
I must stand strong in the face of anxiety without wavering or fear,
I’m going to sleep in peace tonight without worry or doubt,
And shall sleep with a smile on my face knowing you’re banished, Yes, kicked out.
Good night, Sleep tight because ain’t no bedbugs biting tonight,
‘Cause as tired as I am right now, nothing would dare disrupt my sleep tonight!