“Won’t Be Moved”

I’ve entered into a pretty bad head place right now,
Trying to fight my way out the best I know how,
Trying not to waver to my left nor right,
Giving my all using every ounce of might,
My body is tired and in need of relief,
Yet I will not be moved, nor face defeat,
I’m tired of the storm clouds hovering over my head,
Yet anxious to reach the sunlight that shines just ahead,
Life is just beginning,” I often tell myself,
Don’t quit now beloved,” I say to encourage myself,
Press towards the mark, hold fast and stay the course,
And plug into the Holy One, the Ultimate Power Source,
I will not be moved, not tonight, not ever,
Flee Hasatan, you can’t have me now…not ever!!

© 2015

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“HOTEL HELL”

I came to an overnight Women’s Retreat and stayed at this hotel/conference center. This is the second year AGAPE has held their religious conference at this new location, however they obviously don’t know what is done in the dark or when eyes are closed.

Nevertheless, the conference was Friday morning to Saturday evening, but I became ill and had to extend my hotel stay another night. With that said, it is amazing how the staff is trained to basically kiss butt and suck up to you during the time you are registered for the conference, but outside of that stay, their true colors shine through.

From the moment the conference ended and the women in attendance left to go home, it has been the “STAY IN HELL!” I came up to lie down due to a migraine headache and everything from requesting for a trash can for the room (twice), to someone’s car alarm continually going off in the parking lot, to the train passing through shaking the hotel every 10 minutes (Where were these trains yesterday ), the Real Staff (the others were robots) being hung up on while trying to order room service, and to the rowdy teenagers (school trip) slamming doors and bumping against the wall next door I’ve had to endure misery. So much misery where I began to ask, “Lord am I being punished?”

Anyone that endure migraine headaches know that you seek a quiet place without lighting to rest and try to soothe the pain until it goes away. Anyone that endures these migraines also know that your patience is limited and the desire to “SET IT OFF” is intensified.

I am pleased to say the teenagers next door and the rude staff members have not experienced the fury of my wrath, Thank GOD for Jesus. However, I’ve been deceived and I will never stay overnight in this place ever again. Fort McGruder Conference Center and Hotel should really be called Hotel Hell!

“Anxiety, Fear and Insomnia”

After falling asleep for only 2 hours I was awakened abruptly,
I jumped out of bed realizing I was sweating and clammy,
I tried not to think to much of it and proceeded to plug in my fan,
When I noticed my heart rate was rapid and my breathing was becoming shallow,
Is this anxiety again or some deeper issue I have to face?
As I’ve learned anxiety can impersonate and mimic several different conditions,
So I attempt to relax because I don’t want to panic or over analyze this situation,
Because the thought of something major happening merely intensifies the ordeal,
Bargaining and pleading is ALWAYS the next course of action,
Then confession and repentance is the next thing that follows,
I’m not a perfect individual, I make my share of mistakes,
YET, I am the child of the Most High GOD who looks beyond my faults,
He loves me unconditionally without wavering or stipulation,
He truly loves us more than we could ever love ourselves.
I woke up abruptly rattled quite a bit and confused,
Now daylight has thrust through my window pane bringing greetings of a new day,
And while grateful to see this day, I must rest as if it’s still night,
Because without proper resting it would be difficult to stand up to face these battles of life,
My heart rate has calmed and the storm has ceased,
So now I’ll lie myself down and rest in tranquil and perfect peace,
In the arms of my Heavenly Father that is always with me,
That desires to comfort me, care for me and cover me under the shadow of HIS mighty wings.
Good morning to some of you and Goodnight to others.
I’m about to embark upon some of the best sleep ever!

ⓒ 2015

“Get Away”

I feel like I’m surrounded by a bunch of looney tunes,
With their faces squint up as if they’d eaten bitter prunes,
Then madness surrounds me it seems each and everyday,
And no one is feeling happy unless they’re having their own way.

Must it be so hard to come together to get it all done?
For the pressure from all this mess inside bears the weight of several tons,
And my shoulders are weakening so I can’t carry much more,
Because your venom is so poisonous, it breaks down to the core.

Negativity is so thick in the people that come around me,
Transferring quickly from body to body making it difficult to see,
Until it jumps off them upon you to take your breath away,
As you fight to break free in silence because invisibility stands in the way.

I’ve got to get away from the chaos that’s quite difficult to escape,
And I’ve got to leave this web of destruction for good ole sanity’s sake,
For the world in which we live today, no words can fully describe,
Yet we must journey along each God giving day, doing our best to live and survive!

ⓒ 2015